I haven't really given much thought to my reading list for this summer. My goal will be to finish up some of the books that I've started, and spend some time enjoying my latest stash from Barnes and Noble. And then there's a few that I'll probably buy towards the end of the summer. They are in no particular order
Books To Finish:
Who Are We? by Samuel Huntington (I started this last summer while traveling through Europe. I've made it about halfway)
Some Thoughts Concerning Education by John Locke (I start this a few days before heading back to school last August. I didn't get very far, but I'm excited to start it again)
Miracles by CS Lewis (I'm a little more than halfway through it...it's taking me a while)
New Book Stash from BN:
The Madonnas of Leningrad by Debra Dean
Bel Canto by Ann Patchett
The Nazi Officer's Wife by Edith Hahn Beer
Jane Austen Ruined My Life by Beth Pattillo
Me and Mr. Darcy by Alexandra Potter
Becoming Jane Austen by Jon Spence
Mansfield Park by Jane Austen
Emma by Jane Austen
(Yes, those are all VERY girly books - cut me some slack!)
The Day of Battle: The War in Sicily and Italy, 1943-1944 by Rick Atkinson. It was recommended to me by a history buff I stayed with in Berlin. It's the second volume of "The Liberation Trilogy" (I need to find the first Volume - An Army At Dawn).
Books I Will Purchase At A Later Date:
Resounding Truth by Jeremy Begbie
C.S. Lewis: A Shiver of Wonder by Derick Bingham
And I will gladly take any other suggestions!
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Sunday, January 3, 2010
A New Year
(Part 1 of a undetermined amount of parts welcoming in the New Year)
Welcome to 2010! As usual, I haven't written all semester, so it didn't really make sense for me to write up an entry about resolutions for the new year, but some habits just don't die.
I just flipped back to my entry from 2009, where I critiqued my previous resolution and set some new ones. So here were the goals for 2009:
-Practice my clarinet more
I seem to make that a goal every year, and the same thing happens. Nothing changes. To top it off, I spent nearly 6 weeks away from my clarinet this summer.
-Do my laundry more often so it doesn't take half a day
Well, it partially worked. I did manage to do my laundry more often at the beginning of sophomore year, but it still took a while, and by the end, I ended up bringing my laundry home for Thanksgiving and Christmas breaks.
-Consistently keep my room clean
This was almost an epic fail. My room will forever show the amount of stress in my life - the more stress, the more clutter, until I get so stressed, I drop everything and clean up my room at the most inconvenient time possible.
-Create a study/play schedule that gets me to bed at a decent hour
If I remember correctly, I didn't even bother to attempt such a thing.
-Take more personal time, to simply listen to music or journal
That finally started happening a month or so ago, and I did do a lot of journaling while in Europe, but this will be a continued project
-My goal for the summer of 2009: see how many works of CS Lewis I can read in one summer
This may be the first resolution I was actually able to keep!! I read 6 of Lewis' books, and started a 7th. I'm quite proud of that accomplishment!
-Finally be able to reconcile my past with my present and trusting God to help me move forward
I can honestly say -"what was I thinking?!" That is not something that I can simply make as a New Year's resolution and hope that it will come true.
When thinking about the new year, I kept thinking about change. What I wanted to do to change myself in some way, to better myself. But I think I have it all wrong. Instead of looking to create a better me, I should be looking for ways to discover my true self. Or rediscover..
I've thought a lot about what I think is wrong with me, and ways I could change. Things that I desperately want to change about myself. My compulsive perfectionism is one huge part of that. I've come to realize how much of a destructive force that has been in my life since, oh, about 7th grade. Anytime I didn't meet the standards I had set for myself, I would beat myself up terribly about it, and then tell myself I just had to work harder and focus more. And so I did. I kept chasing after these standards till someone, who I thought had a good piece of advice, suggested that my standards were too high. So I lowered by standards, thinking that then I would be content. But I hated myself even more for having lowered the standards, and became stressed out about...not stressing out! I've decided that the person who told me to lower my standards is, in the nicest, most Christian way of putting it, an idiot. As a compulsive perfectionist, my self-esteem and self-worth has been completely tied into my schoolwork and my music. Lowering my standards did nothing to change that, and in fact made the situation much worse. There's nothing wrong with having high standards, but it's my reaction to my failure to reach those standards that's the problem. A failure in schoolwork shouldn't devastate my sense of self-worth. So this year, I'm trying something different. I'm going to admit that I have a competitive edge, and I'm going to aim for the best that I can possibly do - but in a number of categories (which I won't get to in here). I'm going to aim towards being well-rounded, but I'm going to push myself to be the best well-rounded person I can be.
The other part, involving my self-esteem and self-worth I got a bit of insight from today during church. One of my professors (Dr. Pearse) from school came to speak at a friend's church, and I always love having the opportunity to annoy him, so I heard him "preach" on "Why The Rest Hates The West" (he has a book out by that same title - I would completely recommend it!). In the midst of a number of points I am already familiar with (having read his book and survived his course), but one thing stuck out to me that I didn't catch the first time. In the modern West, we've lost our sense of identity, and need to fill it somehow (usually by consumerism). The freedom that we so greatly value has freed us from the ties which would have given us a grounding for answering the question "who am I?". He compared that to the great hymn writer, Issac Watts, who wrote
"When I survey the wondrous cross
on which the Prince of glory died,
my richest gain I count but loss,
and pour contempt on all my pride.
Were the whole realm
of nature mine,
that were an offer far too small;
love so amazing, so divine,
demands my soul, my life, my all."
Contrast that with our Western self-loathing. We might think Watts an egomaniac for thinking that the best gift he could give God was Himself. But in truth, it's because he had a proper view of himself. We are created in the image of God. We have greater worth than the whole realm of nature. Driving back from church, I was listening to David Crowder's Church Music album, and the song came up "We Are Loved". The chorus is
"O we are loved
We are loved
And it's quite enough that
We are loved"
For perhaps the first time, I'm starting to come to grips with this idea of our worth driving from being created Imago Dei, and that God loves us. For years I kept thinking that when people told me to seek my worth from God, I was suppose to seek applause from Him, just as I did from everyone else. But that's not it at all.
So this year, it's about becoming my real self, working my way through the lies I've believed for too long. It's still confusing at this point, and there's a long way to go, but this is certainly going to be an interesting year.
Welcome to 2010! As usual, I haven't written all semester, so it didn't really make sense for me to write up an entry about resolutions for the new year, but some habits just don't die.
I just flipped back to my entry from 2009, where I critiqued my previous resolution and set some new ones. So here were the goals for 2009:
-Practice my clarinet more
I seem to make that a goal every year, and the same thing happens. Nothing changes. To top it off, I spent nearly 6 weeks away from my clarinet this summer.
-Do my laundry more often so it doesn't take half a day
Well, it partially worked. I did manage to do my laundry more often at the beginning of sophomore year, but it still took a while, and by the end, I ended up bringing my laundry home for Thanksgiving and Christmas breaks.
-Consistently keep my room clean
This was almost an epic fail. My room will forever show the amount of stress in my life - the more stress, the more clutter, until I get so stressed, I drop everything and clean up my room at the most inconvenient time possible.
-Create a study/play schedule that gets me to bed at a decent hour
If I remember correctly, I didn't even bother to attempt such a thing.
-Take more personal time, to simply listen to music or journal
That finally started happening a month or so ago, and I did do a lot of journaling while in Europe, but this will be a continued project
-My goal for the summer of 2009: see how many works of CS Lewis I can read in one summer
This may be the first resolution I was actually able to keep!! I read 6 of Lewis' books, and started a 7th. I'm quite proud of that accomplishment!
-Finally be able to reconcile my past with my present and trusting God to help me move forward
I can honestly say -"what was I thinking?!" That is not something that I can simply make as a New Year's resolution and hope that it will come true.
When thinking about the new year, I kept thinking about change. What I wanted to do to change myself in some way, to better myself. But I think I have it all wrong. Instead of looking to create a better me, I should be looking for ways to discover my true self. Or rediscover..
I've thought a lot about what I think is wrong with me, and ways I could change. Things that I desperately want to change about myself. My compulsive perfectionism is one huge part of that. I've come to realize how much of a destructive force that has been in my life since, oh, about 7th grade. Anytime I didn't meet the standards I had set for myself, I would beat myself up terribly about it, and then tell myself I just had to work harder and focus more. And so I did. I kept chasing after these standards till someone, who I thought had a good piece of advice, suggested that my standards were too high. So I lowered by standards, thinking that then I would be content. But I hated myself even more for having lowered the standards, and became stressed out about...not stressing out! I've decided that the person who told me to lower my standards is, in the nicest, most Christian way of putting it, an idiot. As a compulsive perfectionist, my self-esteem and self-worth has been completely tied into my schoolwork and my music. Lowering my standards did nothing to change that, and in fact made the situation much worse. There's nothing wrong with having high standards, but it's my reaction to my failure to reach those standards that's the problem. A failure in schoolwork shouldn't devastate my sense of self-worth. So this year, I'm trying something different. I'm going to admit that I have a competitive edge, and I'm going to aim for the best that I can possibly do - but in a number of categories (which I won't get to in here). I'm going to aim towards being well-rounded, but I'm going to push myself to be the best well-rounded person I can be.
The other part, involving my self-esteem and self-worth I got a bit of insight from today during church. One of my professors (Dr. Pearse) from school came to speak at a friend's church, and I always love having the opportunity to annoy him, so I heard him "preach" on "Why The Rest Hates The West" (he has a book out by that same title - I would completely recommend it!). In the midst of a number of points I am already familiar with (having read his book and survived his course), but one thing stuck out to me that I didn't catch the first time. In the modern West, we've lost our sense of identity, and need to fill it somehow (usually by consumerism). The freedom that we so greatly value has freed us from the ties which would have given us a grounding for answering the question "who am I?". He compared that to the great hymn writer, Issac Watts, who wrote
"When I survey the wondrous cross
on which the Prince of glory died,
my richest gain I count but loss,
and pour contempt on all my pride.
Were the whole realm
of nature mine,
that were an offer far too small;
love so amazing, so divine,
demands my soul, my life, my all."
Contrast that with our Western self-loathing. We might think Watts an egomaniac for thinking that the best gift he could give God was Himself. But in truth, it's because he had a proper view of himself. We are created in the image of God. We have greater worth than the whole realm of nature. Driving back from church, I was listening to David Crowder's Church Music album, and the song came up "We Are Loved". The chorus is
"O we are loved
We are loved
And it's quite enough that
We are loved"
For perhaps the first time, I'm starting to come to grips with this idea of our worth driving from being created Imago Dei, and that God loves us. For years I kept thinking that when people told me to seek my worth from God, I was suppose to seek applause from Him, just as I did from everyone else. But that's not it at all.
So this year, it's about becoming my real self, working my way through the lies I've believed for too long. It's still confusing at this point, and there's a long way to go, but this is certainly going to be an interesting year.
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Precious Lord, Take My Hand
by Rev. Thomas A. Dorsey
Precious Lord, take my hand
Lead me on, let me stand
I am tired, I am weak, I am worn
Through the storm, through the night
Lead me on to the light
Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home
When my way grows drear
Precious Lord linger near
When my light is almost gone
Hear my cry, hear my call
Hold my hand lest I fall
Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home
When the darkness appears
And the night draws near
And the day is past and gone
At the river I stand
Guide my feet, hold my hand
Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home
Precious Lord, take my hand
Lead me on, let me stand
I'm tired, I'm weak, I'm lone
Through the storm, through the night
Lead me on to the light
Take my hand precious Lord, lead me home
Monday, August 17, 2009
Too Many People Grow Up
“Too many people grow up. That's the real trouble with the world, too many people grow up. They forget. They don't remember what it's like to be 12 years old. They patronize, they treat children as inferiors. Well I won't do that.” - Walt Disney
Here is my response to an article written by a friend at her own blog: http://wallflower1332.blogspot.com/2009/08/we-grow-neither-better-nor-worse-as-we.html
I refuse to grow up.
I realized the other day that one of the last things in the world I wanted to do was to grow up. All my life, I've been wanting to grow up, be cool, and couldn't wait until I was Samantha's age from the TV show Wishbone. But I think the mere fact that I still make references to Wishbone shows just how much I don't want to grow up. There was a time, back during my freshman year of high school, when one friend told me "You're like a 30 year old trapped inside the body of a 13 year old". And I thought that was awesome! I was already acting like an adult? How cool was that! But I don't want to grow up anymore.
At this point, I should clarify one thing. Just because I don't want to grow up doesn't mean I don't want to enter the adult world. I do! I want to get a job, start a life, have an apartment, travel and see the world and all those other "adult" things. But while I enter the adult world, I don't want to grow up and become an adult.
Because in my mind, growing up is a horrible idea. I'd have to stop sleeping with my stuffed animals. I'd have to actually stick to a certified organizational system, rather than creating my own "organized mess". I wouldn't be allowed to get into shallow, immature arguments with my friends. I would be told to sell my old Nancy Drew books and other childhood favorites. I would be told to not spend so much money at a bookstore - it wasn't frugal. In short - I would have to work, eat, sleep, have only regulated fun times and enter a world where you are supposed to be mature, responsible and grown up.
And to that world, I say nothing. I simply grab my baby blankets, stomp my feet into place and start pouting. Because I will not grow up. I will continue to do crazy and immature things when I haven't had enough sleep and I'm with my friends. I'll continue to sleep with my stuffed animals. I will keep my living quarters as neat or messy as I want. I will have so many bookshelves, and they will proudly display Nancy Drew and Wishbone, right next to Medieval Political Philosophy. I will buy books and read them, pass them to my friends and cherish them (face it - if you've seen my town's library, there's not nearly enough there to keep my interest). I'll continue to do things to show my friends that I care, even when it might not be considered fiscally responsible. I am going to hold on to my inner child.
So I will enter this new world of jobs, taxes, and politics. But while I'll sit and debate topics of controversy, you can be sure that the child inside of me is reading a Nancy Drew story when she should be asleep.
Epilogue (for Ally):
I really should admit though, that I am extremely excited about several leadership councils I'm involved with this year and the opportunity to make a difference on campus. I'm always thrilled when I discover that I can really cook (and not just bake). And I'm also going to be more dedicated to my studies this year, though it's more out of necessity than anything else. My sinkmate is actually going to drag me to the gym to work out with her. Oh, and be careful with the fish ; )
Here is my response to an article written by a friend at her own blog: http://wallflower1332.blogspot.com/2009/08/we-grow-neither-better-nor-worse-as-we.html
I refuse to grow up.
I realized the other day that one of the last things in the world I wanted to do was to grow up. All my life, I've been wanting to grow up, be cool, and couldn't wait until I was Samantha's age from the TV show Wishbone. But I think the mere fact that I still make references to Wishbone shows just how much I don't want to grow up. There was a time, back during my freshman year of high school, when one friend told me "You're like a 30 year old trapped inside the body of a 13 year old". And I thought that was awesome! I was already acting like an adult? How cool was that! But I don't want to grow up anymore.
At this point, I should clarify one thing. Just because I don't want to grow up doesn't mean I don't want to enter the adult world. I do! I want to get a job, start a life, have an apartment, travel and see the world and all those other "adult" things. But while I enter the adult world, I don't want to grow up and become an adult.
Because in my mind, growing up is a horrible idea. I'd have to stop sleeping with my stuffed animals. I'd have to actually stick to a certified organizational system, rather than creating my own "organized mess". I wouldn't be allowed to get into shallow, immature arguments with my friends. I would be told to sell my old Nancy Drew books and other childhood favorites. I would be told to not spend so much money at a bookstore - it wasn't frugal. In short - I would have to work, eat, sleep, have only regulated fun times and enter a world where you are supposed to be mature, responsible and grown up.
And to that world, I say nothing. I simply grab my baby blankets, stomp my feet into place and start pouting. Because I will not grow up. I will continue to do crazy and immature things when I haven't had enough sleep and I'm with my friends. I'll continue to sleep with my stuffed animals. I will keep my living quarters as neat or messy as I want. I will have so many bookshelves, and they will proudly display Nancy Drew and Wishbone, right next to Medieval Political Philosophy. I will buy books and read them, pass them to my friends and cherish them (face it - if you've seen my town's library, there's not nearly enough there to keep my interest). I'll continue to do things to show my friends that I care, even when it might not be considered fiscally responsible. I am going to hold on to my inner child.
So I will enter this new world of jobs, taxes, and politics. But while I'll sit and debate topics of controversy, you can be sure that the child inside of me is reading a Nancy Drew story when she should be asleep.
Epilogue (for Ally):
I really should admit though, that I am extremely excited about several leadership councils I'm involved with this year and the opportunity to make a difference on campus. I'm always thrilled when I discover that I can really cook (and not just bake). And I'm also going to be more dedicated to my studies this year, though it's more out of necessity than anything else. My sinkmate is actually going to drag me to the gym to work out with her. Oh, and be careful with the fish ; )
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Adding to the Worship Wars
The Church today is caught up in "Worship Wars". This is nothing new or shocking unless you've lived under a rock for 15 or 20 years. Every since Contemporary praise music started to "come into the scene" in a major way, local churches have started "wars" over the music to be played during the services. The Western church has become divided on the issue, starting new churches, making separate services for the various styles, and trying to find compromises that will keep everyone happy, in the same service and the same building.
Up until a few months ago, I saw this as merely a fact of life. People will disagree about music, so play a couple of hymns, a few modern songs, then get on to the sermon. Such an apathetic view might seem shocking coming from a musician. But my church has almost seamlessly made the transition, especially after it somewhat survived a split over money. So music style was never exactly the first thing on my mind during a service.
Then I went to college. (How many stories start with that?)
During the first semester I took a course called "Music in the Christian Perspective". It was an introductory music course, and during the wide range of discussions, morality of music was discussed. We looked at Plato's view, and some other writings. Just today, in fact, a man from my church was discussing the Reformed view of the arts - the arts are not amoral, but moral. Such an idea crossed my mind until MCP. While I don't recall the final outcome of the course discussion, it did prompt me to look into Christian music a bit further.
One day a friend of mine, S. K. Johnson (http://apostello.wordpress.com/) started up a discussion with me about a paper he was writing called "Religion for Coach Potatoes". In it, he points out how worship music today does not force us to use our intellect. Citing Issac Watts, author of many of the great hymns, he writes that "In Watts’ hymns, knowing about God was necessary to understand the concepts being expressed, and thus to be able to sincerely express them in worship." He goes on to say that "his method has a specific goal in mind; acknowledging who God is with clarity and depth, and developing understanding of these divine truths in the soul so that it raises up in worship. Declaring that “God is great” is only worship, if we truly know why we are saying it. This method of worship, as a sequence of understanding and then response, thought and then emotion is all throughout Scripture. Ezra led Israel in worship by first telling the history of Israel up to that point, and then the Hebrews worshiped God for what He had done. Or, as it says in Romans 12, “in view of God’s mercies...worship” (NIV, emphasis added)." He compares that style of worship with the one that we find in our CCM style today. "The songs that have resulted from the CCM industry use very simple language, are often repetitive, and are aesthetically emotional. These songs rely on eliciting emotional responses in order to give the facade of understanding an abstract concept. A worshiper may declare something ambiguous about God such as, ‘You are worthy,’ without having their mind brought to a point of understanding what that means."
Clearly, we had a few things to discuss. Or rather, he had a few things to say which I listened, nodded my head, and thought about later.
One night after Koin, the idea finally began to make sense inside of my head. Koinonia, or Koin as we call it on campus, is a student lead praise and worship session held on Sunday nights. And it is really great. Spending an hour, lifting up praise with fellow students is one of the things I love, whether it be in Koin or when a friend pulls out a guitar and a praise session starts in a dorm room. But one night I left thinking "what have I just done?" My mind had been in some far off place while I was singing the songs. Some of the songs were even about me, what I could bring to God. How much I loved God. But God doesn't need that or want that. He knows that we can't bring anything, and that however much we say we love Him, we fall incredibly short when we try to live out our faith. And the most important thing that hit me was the fact that I hadn't thought during the service. I didn't need to use my intellect, it was all about the emotional rush. i hadn't learned anything about God. And that fact didn't sit well with me.
I saw why it matters. It matters what we sing, because if we're not engaged, if we're not lifting God up, then what are we doing? We're going through the motions, though we've learned to cover it up more than you might see in an Orthodox church. These "Worship Wars" should not be about what music we like to listen to in church, but what music we should or need to listen to during a service.
One of the best articles I have read on the subject is entitled "Durable Hymns" by Donald T Williams, on Five mark of Excellence That Could End the Worship Wars.
"The "Worship Wars" that rage in the church today are nothing new. St. Ambrose was considered an innovator for writing hymns and teaching his people to sing them. The controversy over melismatic textual elaboration in the Middle Ages was (according to legend) settled by Palestrina's Pope Marcellus Mass. the Reformation started debates over exclusive psalmody and the use of instruments, debates that continue among Protestants to this day, although they are now overshadowed by heated arguments over contemporary praise and worship music versus traditional hymnody."
He puts forth the idea that in order to judge the music of today, we must look at the music of yesterday. The reason the hymns we still have today are considered "great" is because they've endured years of weeding-out. There was bad music when Issac Watts was writing, but those songs have not survived. Williams argues that there are five points of excellence that made the best stand out and survive, and that those are the points by which we should judge contemporary music.
The first is Biblical Truth. The should be a strong emphasis on the words of praise being at least scriptural, if not Scripture itself. The older printed version of hymns would often include the verses that justified the content of the hymn. Can we look at the music we're singing today and find verses that clearly support it? Often times we can, but they are shorter and simple phrases, instead of longer, more complex passages that were once used.
The second in Theological Profundity. We should be using our minds while we worship! Christ even commands us to love and worship God with our minds! One example Williams cites is Charles Wesley's him "And Can It Be That I Should Gain?" Our music today should offer chances for theological reflection.
A third mark of excellence is Poetic Richness. The words chosen should not be so difficult that a layman cannot understand them, but intellectually suggestive and emotionally powerful. An example is the use of the "wretch" in Amazing Grace".
A fourth mark is Musical Beauty. As any music major will tell you, there are rules in music. And those rules simply must be followed, unless you are writing abstract 20th Century music. There are certain tendencies in music that should be used, and others that should be avoided. Melodies and harmonies should be well shaped. And Williams makes one other point - "And where did so many guitarists get the notion that it is somehow cut to avoid ending a song on the tonic chord?". I can understand not ending on the tonic if you are transitioning to another song which resolves the tension, but let's try to land on the tonic a little more often than we do.
The fifth mark is Fitness. There should be a good fit between the well-written words and excellent music. Everything should be appropriate.
Now, I'm sure many will say "Well, Williams is simply the type of old prude who hates all contemporary music and just likes hymns better, and obviously you feel the same way". But that's not the case. We should look for these marks in our music today, and they can be found. There are so many good Christian bands who have rich and powerful music, in a variety of different styles. But rather than just letting anything into our church, we should have discerning taste. This is one of the reasons why I believe it is critical for Christians to have at least some sort of theological background. It is important to be able to discern not only between good and bad, but between good, better and best. Both traditional hymns and contemporary music should have a home in the modern Church.
Up until a few months ago, I saw this as merely a fact of life. People will disagree about music, so play a couple of hymns, a few modern songs, then get on to the sermon. Such an apathetic view might seem shocking coming from a musician. But my church has almost seamlessly made the transition, especially after it somewhat survived a split over money. So music style was never exactly the first thing on my mind during a service.
Then I went to college. (How many stories start with that?)
During the first semester I took a course called "Music in the Christian Perspective". It was an introductory music course, and during the wide range of discussions, morality of music was discussed. We looked at Plato's view, and some other writings. Just today, in fact, a man from my church was discussing the Reformed view of the arts - the arts are not amoral, but moral. Such an idea crossed my mind until MCP. While I don't recall the final outcome of the course discussion, it did prompt me to look into Christian music a bit further.
One day a friend of mine, S. K. Johnson (http://apostello.wordpress.com/) started up a discussion with me about a paper he was writing called "Religion for Coach Potatoes". In it, he points out how worship music today does not force us to use our intellect. Citing Issac Watts, author of many of the great hymns, he writes that "In Watts’ hymns, knowing about God was necessary to understand the concepts being expressed, and thus to be able to sincerely express them in worship." He goes on to say that "his method has a specific goal in mind; acknowledging who God is with clarity and depth, and developing understanding of these divine truths in the soul so that it raises up in worship. Declaring that “God is great” is only worship, if we truly know why we are saying it. This method of worship, as a sequence of understanding and then response, thought and then emotion is all throughout Scripture. Ezra led Israel in worship by first telling the history of Israel up to that point, and then the Hebrews worshiped God for what He had done. Or, as it says in Romans 12, “in view of God’s mercies...worship” (NIV, emphasis added)." He compares that style of worship with the one that we find in our CCM style today. "The songs that have resulted from the CCM industry use very simple language, are often repetitive, and are aesthetically emotional. These songs rely on eliciting emotional responses in order to give the facade of understanding an abstract concept. A worshiper may declare something ambiguous about God such as, ‘You are worthy,’ without having their mind brought to a point of understanding what that means."
Clearly, we had a few things to discuss. Or rather, he had a few things to say which I listened, nodded my head, and thought about later.
One night after Koin, the idea finally began to make sense inside of my head. Koinonia, or Koin as we call it on campus, is a student lead praise and worship session held on Sunday nights. And it is really great. Spending an hour, lifting up praise with fellow students is one of the things I love, whether it be in Koin or when a friend pulls out a guitar and a praise session starts in a dorm room. But one night I left thinking "what have I just done?" My mind had been in some far off place while I was singing the songs. Some of the songs were even about me, what I could bring to God. How much I loved God. But God doesn't need that or want that. He knows that we can't bring anything, and that however much we say we love Him, we fall incredibly short when we try to live out our faith. And the most important thing that hit me was the fact that I hadn't thought during the service. I didn't need to use my intellect, it was all about the emotional rush. i hadn't learned anything about God. And that fact didn't sit well with me.
I saw why it matters. It matters what we sing, because if we're not engaged, if we're not lifting God up, then what are we doing? We're going through the motions, though we've learned to cover it up more than you might see in an Orthodox church. These "Worship Wars" should not be about what music we like to listen to in church, but what music we should or need to listen to during a service.
One of the best articles I have read on the subject is entitled "Durable Hymns" by Donald T Williams, on Five mark of Excellence That Could End the Worship Wars.
"The "Worship Wars" that rage in the church today are nothing new. St. Ambrose was considered an innovator for writing hymns and teaching his people to sing them. The controversy over melismatic textual elaboration in the Middle Ages was (according to legend) settled by Palestrina's Pope Marcellus Mass. the Reformation started debates over exclusive psalmody and the use of instruments, debates that continue among Protestants to this day, although they are now overshadowed by heated arguments over contemporary praise and worship music versus traditional hymnody."
He puts forth the idea that in order to judge the music of today, we must look at the music of yesterday. The reason the hymns we still have today are considered "great" is because they've endured years of weeding-out. There was bad music when Issac Watts was writing, but those songs have not survived. Williams argues that there are five points of excellence that made the best stand out and survive, and that those are the points by which we should judge contemporary music.
The first is Biblical Truth. The should be a strong emphasis on the words of praise being at least scriptural, if not Scripture itself. The older printed version of hymns would often include the verses that justified the content of the hymn. Can we look at the music we're singing today and find verses that clearly support it? Often times we can, but they are shorter and simple phrases, instead of longer, more complex passages that were once used.
The second in Theological Profundity. We should be using our minds while we worship! Christ even commands us to love and worship God with our minds! One example Williams cites is Charles Wesley's him "And Can It Be That I Should Gain?" Our music today should offer chances for theological reflection.
A third mark of excellence is Poetic Richness. The words chosen should not be so difficult that a layman cannot understand them, but intellectually suggestive and emotionally powerful. An example is the use of the "wretch" in Amazing Grace".
A fourth mark is Musical Beauty. As any music major will tell you, there are rules in music. And those rules simply must be followed, unless you are writing abstract 20th Century music. There are certain tendencies in music that should be used, and others that should be avoided. Melodies and harmonies should be well shaped. And Williams makes one other point - "And where did so many guitarists get the notion that it is somehow cut to avoid ending a song on the tonic chord?". I can understand not ending on the tonic if you are transitioning to another song which resolves the tension, but let's try to land on the tonic a little more often than we do.
The fifth mark is Fitness. There should be a good fit between the well-written words and excellent music. Everything should be appropriate.
Now, I'm sure many will say "Well, Williams is simply the type of old prude who hates all contemporary music and just likes hymns better, and obviously you feel the same way". But that's not the case. We should look for these marks in our music today, and they can be found. There are so many good Christian bands who have rich and powerful music, in a variety of different styles. But rather than just letting anything into our church, we should have discerning taste. This is one of the reasons why I believe it is critical for Christians to have at least some sort of theological background. It is important to be able to discern not only between good and bad, but between good, better and best. Both traditional hymns and contemporary music should have a home in the modern Church.
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Times - Tenth Avenue North
I know I need You
I need to love You
I love to see You, but it's been so long
I long to feel You
I feel this need for You
And I need to hear You, is that so wrong?
Now You pull me near You
When we're close, I fear You
Still I'm afraid to tell You, all that I've done
Are You done forgiving?
Oh can You look past my pretending?
Lord, I'm so tired of defending, what I've become
What have I become?
I hear You say,
"My love is over. It's underneath.
It's inside. It's in between.
The times you doubt Me, when you can't feel.
The times that you question, 'Is this for real?'
The times you're broken.
The times that you mend.
The times that you hate Me, and the times that you bend.
Well, My love is over, it's underneath.
It's inside, it's in between.
These times you're healing, and when your heart breaks.
The times that you feel like you're falling from grace.
The times you're hurting.
The times that you heal.
The times you go hungry, and are tempted to steal.
The times of confusion, in chaos and pain.
I'm there in your sorrow, under the weight of your shame.
I'm there through your heartache.
I'm there in the storm.
My love I will keep you, by My pow'r alone.
I don't care where you fall, where you have been.
I'll never forsake you, My love never ends.
It never ends."
Friday, July 31, 2009
Out of the Silent Planet
This afternoon I finished the 6th book by CS Lewis of the summer (9th book overall). It was the first book in his space trilogy "Out of the Silent Planet".
I will admit, I approached this book with a fair amount of apprehension, and with a suspicion that I wasn't really going to like it. I'm hardly what one would call a fan of science fiction. All the remarks I've heard about the trilogy before could be basically summed up in one statement : you'll either love it or hate it.
I decidedly fall somewhere in between. It is not one of my most favorite works of Lewis - it ranks close to the bottom. I didn't really start to enjoy it until about halfway through the book. When Ransom finally encounters some other...beings, I'll call them...that's when I finally became interested. I don't really like it when an author spends a great deal of time on details, and when you're attempting to describe a different world to a reader, you end up spending about the first half of the work focusing on detail about the surroundings. The character development, intertwined with loosely veiled Biblical allusions towards the end, was what really caught my attention. I have always been amazed at Lewis' talent to seamlessly blend Biblical truths with fiction or mythology, yet not in such a way as to be called blasphemous. If you can make it to the end of the story, I would say that Lewis proves his ability in that area in "Out of the Silent Planet" even better than he did in "The Chronicles of Narnia".
I will admit, I approached this book with a fair amount of apprehension, and with a suspicion that I wasn't really going to like it. I'm hardly what one would call a fan of science fiction. All the remarks I've heard about the trilogy before could be basically summed up in one statement : you'll either love it or hate it.
I decidedly fall somewhere in between. It is not one of my most favorite works of Lewis - it ranks close to the bottom. I didn't really start to enjoy it until about halfway through the book. When Ransom finally encounters some other...beings, I'll call them...that's when I finally became interested. I don't really like it when an author spends a great deal of time on details, and when you're attempting to describe a different world to a reader, you end up spending about the first half of the work focusing on detail about the surroundings. The character development, intertwined with loosely veiled Biblical allusions towards the end, was what really caught my attention. I have always been amazed at Lewis' talent to seamlessly blend Biblical truths with fiction or mythology, yet not in such a way as to be called blasphemous. If you can make it to the end of the story, I would say that Lewis proves his ability in that area in "Out of the Silent Planet" even better than he did in "The Chronicles of Narnia".
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